Hi there, friend. Are you desperate about your problematic marriage, and think it’s going to end. Maybe you think it’s already doomed and there’s nothing you can do to save your marriage.
Well, let me tell you something: You’re wrong. Very wrong. EVERY troubled marriage can be saved - without exception. Lack of communication? Infidelity? Doesn’t matter, you can fix your troubled marriage. So, what must you do? Should you beg, should you cry, or should you just ignore your spouse?
Now, as in everything; in saving marriages there are things you must do and you mustn’t do for the best outcome. The number one thing you must NOT do is to beg your partner for forgiveness about the mistakes you did in your relationship. Look it up on the Internet. In both “get my ex back” guides and “save my marriage” guides, there is a simple, SINGLE constant: You must NOT beg your partner for forgiveness to get him/her back.
This is an universal law, and it’s not ever going to change. If you chase someone, he / she is going to run away. It’s the most simple and best known rule of human nature: People want what they can’t have. The equivalent of that law is: The easier something someone can access, the less he / she is going to want it!
Yes, your spouse acts as if he / she doesn’t want you anymore, and that may even be true. And yes, you’d do anything to get him / her back and fix your marriage - so by the above paragraph, you are in a disadvantage! Does that mean you just have to accept it and start crying? NO! Emulate a better situation. Yes, you do want him / her like mad, but do not show this to your partner. Do not beg, do not cry, do not do anything of that kind. That is rule number 1 for saving marriages.
Rule number two depends on the actual situation of your marriage. Has your spouse openly said he/she wants a divorce? If not, has he/she ever uttered that d-word? If your partner has uttered the divorce word to you, regardless of whether he/she has explicitly said it - your spouse is thinking of divorce. If he/she has never said anything about getting divorced, the thought is probably scaring him/her. So what should YOUR stance be on divorce? I know I know, you wouldn’t even think of it. But remember - we will be displaying another situation than we are in.
Most “get your ex back” guides will tell you to act as if you actually agree with the breakup. And this is a good move, concerning people that aren’t married. But being married constitutes a different situation. Married couples divorce, not married couples simply break up. Divorcing is a lot more difficult, and a lot more scarier, than simply breaking up. So, your strategy is going to be: If your partner already thinks about getting a divorce, you do not agree with him/her EVER, because that will clear the last doubts against this scary divorce thing your spouse has on his/her mind.
But if he/she hasn’t talked about divorcing to you, then you can invoke fear in him by talking about it. Don’t just say “I want to divorce”, never! Just prod the “idea” in one of your conversations. He/she, being distant to you but never having talked about divorce to you, is obviously scared of the thought; and if you utter it explicitly, there is a very good chance it will act in a counter-intuitive way and he/she will want you back, because YOU are the escaping one now.
Looking for some way to fix your marriage? This site has the story of a woman who has some great marriage counseling. Be sure to visit!
Get timely ideas for wedding favours - your own tips store.
